hey sexy

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Stranger: hey sexy

You: you have me confused with someone else

You: i am mildly sexy at best

Stranger: im so horny

Stranger: wont you hel?

Stranger: *help?

You: i guess i can

Stranger: please do babes

You: what turns you on?

You: i will pretend that is my speciaty

You: *specialty

You: are you cumming yet?

You: I'm trying my best

Stranger: what would you do to me if i was on your bed?

You: that depends if you are male or female

You: i have two very different scenarios pictured

Stranger: female

You: i assume you are lying but i can pretend

You: i suppose i would probably attempt to woo you in some way

You: this normally results in me not getting any

You: so i should probably do the opposite of my natural inclinations

Stranger: dominate me

Stranger: do what you will

Stranger: i need something

Stranger: im acheing

You: are you all ready naked because that changes my opening move?

You: supposing you are all ready naked, i would probably take off my clothes as well

Stranger: im always naked

You: don't you get cold

You: oh wait, the sex

Stranger: not when i have you to heat me up

You: i get distracted easily

You: i guess I should probably mount you in some way

You: what are your favorite positions?

Stranger: im def a backwards cow girl

Stranger: but babe, you do as you like

You: backwards cowgirl is fine with me

You: it also has the benefit of me not needing to do much

You: so i guess i would lay down on the bed

You: wait, that should be lie down

You: even in sex, proper grammar

Stranger: def

Stranger: and i would straddle you

You: yes, that is generally how the position works

Stranger: pressing my breasts into your mouth

You: that is not backwards cowgirl

Stranger: i start this way

You: unless you are extremely flexible

Stranger: duh

You: oh, good then

You: because you were kind of creeping me out with how flexible you were

Stranger: now what?

You: i guess would be sucking on your breasts

You: seeing as they would be in my face and all

You: also, breasts are pretty great

You: probably playing with your nipples and so forth

You: i guess you could blow me or something

You: by the way, while you are blowing me, i am eating a sandwich

Your conversational partner has disconnected.